I’m a firm believer that to have the things you want in life, you first have to release the things you don’t want.
Do you agree?
For instance, if you want a happy life, you have to let go of the things – people, past experiences, etc. – that are keeping you unhappy. If you want to be debt free, you have to give up the habits that are keeping you cash strapped (like credit card charges that aren't for emergency essentials).
But sometimes that’s easier said than done.
Firstly, struggle doesn’t just appear out of nowhere. It’s created when we make decisions that contradict what we say we want.
Second, struggle can be addictive if we’re unaware of our need for it, or if we don’t realize how comfortable we have become with it. When we get so used to behaving or living a certain way, we may not even realize just how badly we are undermining our own happiness.
But there is a cost to the struggle. Unhappiness. Loneliness. Lost friendships. Drama. Even physical suffering.
At the height of my people-pleasing phase, my hair started to fall out. Think on that. I was putting so much stress and pressure on myself to make everyone else happy and comfortable, that I was losing hair. Not to make light of things, but it’s like my hair said, “this is too much, we’re out of here.” I can joke about it now, but it was not a pleasant way of life then.
So tell me, do you know the cost of your struggle?
Are you miserable all the time? Making the people around you miserable and drained? Are you always entangled in some drama and mess or associated with problematic people?
Are you eating or drinking to soothe your pain or coasting through life, checked out from what’s happening to and around you? Have you lost out on opportunities – love, promotions, friendships – because you lack self-awareness or only see others’ faults and not your own.
There is always a cost to the struggle. I want you to tune into yours.
To help, I created this video and handout to get you focused in on the particular things in your life that it's time to release.
The video is titled Release the Struggle and comes with this supplemental handout.